I’m not one to pour out my feelings or how I feel to someone, whenever I’m having one of those days when I just hate myself, everything, everyone and I wish I could just disappear and never come back. But sometimes it feels just right to have someone to listen to all your problems and just tell them how shitty your life is at the moment and not having them secretly judging you. But fuck, you can’t have everything you want can you?
I’m seriously fucking tired of having to entertain these sickening thoughts that my brain produces. Fuck, I don’t need this. At all. It’s frustrating and it mentally drains you.
I’ve been on my own since, forever. I don’t need anyone telling me this and that because, honestly, I can take care of my own self. But that’s the thing, when you appear to be strong, like there’s nothing wrong with your life, people seem to believe you. Because that’s what you decide to show them. You feed them with all these false pretenses. I don’t usually share my problems to people because I feel like I’m just wasting their time. Now, add that to my long list of problems that I have yet dealt with. But like I said, when you don’t talk, and you keep everything inside, that’s when they start eating you out. You know, sometimes, all it takes is to ask someone “Are you okay?”.
Am I okay? Definitely not. Probably never will. But you just gotta live, right?